Sarah Tan – Personal Development

Learning how to achieve goals is an important step to bring about positive changes in your life. It acts as a beacon and guides you to the final destination you want. Goal setting is a very powerful tool whether you use it for business, personal, sports or any other purpose in life.

Many people failed to achieve their goals because at the first place, they do not have clear goals to achieve. They have too many goals. That is why their attention is not focused and is divided to different matter.

The simple key in attaining your goals is you through directing yourself towards the realization of a defined concrete goal. That is your starting point. If you already established that, you can start working on it by focusing your attention and avoiding distractions.

Remember that there are too many things in the world that can distract you in attaining your goal. Of course, it is important to do your best and give your maximum effort. Sometimes, the end goal in itself is not that important as in the process of achieving your desired goals.

Then, always remember that not everything is perfect so there are times that you will really encounter problems but consider them as challenges for you. If you failed once, you have to stand up and show the world that you are strong. Too many people give up easily once they encounter the first obstacle to your goals.

A challenge is just a test to pass. Only the weak people will not make it in the end. But if you have enough motivation and determination then surely, you can get your dreams and make it your reality. Just remember each failure and setback you have brings you closer to success.

It is important to see the world as not black and white. There are too many forces that can affect one´s personal experience. What is important is that you know how to manage yourself, for you to attain your goals and succeed in life.

If you want to learn how to achieve goals, i recommend the DNA Of Success Book by Jack M. Zufelt. Click here to learn more about how to achieve goals.

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Many choices in life involve a trade-off or a balance. When there is not enough time, money or energy to accomplish everything you want to do, you will have to choose your priorities carefully, knowing that each pursuit leaves you less time and fewer resources for another goal or interest. However, in the midst of life’s difficult choices, one decision is very simple from an analytical perspective. Whereas many activities have both positive and negative aspects, procrastination is one activity that consumes your time and energy while contributing nothing to your ultimate quality of life. For this reason, even a small amount of consideration should convince you to eliminate procrastination from your life. Yet this habit is not always easy to break, and even the best intentions to stop procrastinating may not be successful. A few tips, and a small bit of effort, can help discontinue the habit of procrastination, allowing you to spend your time on some worthwhile pursuits.

One of the skills that can be extremely helpful in ending procrastination is the ability to prioritize. Not all activities are equally significant, and it is conceivable to dissipate time whilst actually seeming to get things done. In order to avoid procrastinating on your most important tasks, it may be helpful to make a list of all the things you want to accomplish this week. Without making any distinctions between important and insignificant tasks, brainstorm a list of a week’s worth of goals. Once you think you have everything you want written down, either number the items in place of importance from most crucial to least required, or group the items into high-, medium- and low-priority sections. Try to identify your three most important tasks for the week and list on your calendar the things you will need to do in order to successfully complete them. Then you are able to center on these most important undertakings, saving the less significant ones for the time that is left over. Once you have got into the habit of prioritizing your week, move on to prioritizing by month and then by periods of three months.

Another important step in overcoming procrastination is to make sure that you see your ultimate goals in terms of the small steps that you will need to take. By breaking down complicated tasks into manageable stages, each with its own mini-deadline, you will prevent yourself from procrastinating in the belief that your goal is impossible regardless of what you do. In addition, the shorter amounts of time between deadlines will prevent you from procrastinating because a deadline seems so distant that you have all the time in the world. You may find that you are no longer tempted to procrastinate with your important goals when you know what you’ll need to do to accomplish them and exactly how long it will take. Once you have taken these steps to end procrastination, you may find yourself easily accomplishing tasks that once seemed almost impossible.

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About Conversational Hypnosis

Hypnosis is an art, and to become a master in this form of art you must go beyond being an average Conversational Hypnotist and create a masterpiece that is to be called your own. Once you have accomplished this feat you will truly be a part of the Hypnosis world and holding your own and being thoroughly knowledgeable about Conversational Hypnosis.

Conversational Hypnosis has unique aspects that make it different from other forms of Hypnosis. Your goal will be to gather all your knowledge about Conversational Hypnosis and refine it into the art.

It is quite important to master the fine points of the language you will use as well as the hypnotic themes that you will utilize to get your subject into a trance. There is also a need for you to perfect the type of atmosphere you will want to create for your subject. You must also master ways to create tension using authority strategies in order to put the unconscious mind into a functional state.

Now these should need and refined until it becomes the fine art that is about Conversational Hypnosis. Step one in this area of refinement will be to introduce the hypnotic gaze induction. This is one of the main skills that you will use to put a purpose behind the entire hypnosis process. One of the main things you should remember about Conversational Hypnosis and hypnotic gaze induction is that these are very powerful and you would do well to keep that in mind.

The power of the hypnotic gaze induction is under your control and for you to use at your own discretion, it would do you well to remember how powerful this is. To add structure to your hypnosis try adding the hypnosis gaze induction and the 4 stage protocol. To command some sort of action from your listener you should evoke an unconscious response by being able to absorb their attention. Before moving on your aim is to make sure that your subject has completed all four stages in using the hypnosis gaze induction.

The sixty second hypnotist and hypnotic gaze induction techniques should only be attemted once you have mastered conversational hypnosis and the 4 stage protocol techniques. Combining techniques is a sure fire way to make your very own technique, a masterpiece. Keep it simple, start by using rapport techniques and as you use your language with the hypnotic gaze induction you will start to see results.

In the hypnotic gaze induction you are going to want to focus in on several things. First, you will need to remember that in achieving a successful hypnosis gaze induction holding the subject’s gaze is key. It is quite important that you are able to maintain a level, clear and calm gaze. Never must you allow the subject to see, feel or discern that you are uncomfortable with the situation.

This basically tells you everything about Conversational Hypnosis and the techniques you can combine with the basic steps. Each hypnotist develops his own style in performing the art of hypnosis. Now that you have learned the basics about Conversational Hypnosis it is your turn to create your own hypnotic masterpiece.

Colin Henderson runs the popular website Covert Hypnosis Guide. Do you want to Discover more ways to use Covert Hypnosis to benefit your Life? Find out more about these secret techniques and get your “free six part mini course” at Conversational Hypnosis

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When faced with an unpleasant or daunting task, either in personal or professional activities, many people can be tempted to procrastinate. Some procrastination takes the form of dismissing the unpleasant task as something to be done later and then putting it out of mind. At other times, procrastination occurs by wasting one’s time with meaningless pursuits, games and amusements. To complicate matters, not every form of procrastination can be easily dismissed as purely wasted time. For business people and office workers who handle a variety of related tasks every day, certain types of work can actually function as a tool for procrastination. In some cases, tasks that are smaller, simpler, or that might easily be delegated to an intern are used as a diversion from important, complicated, intimidating tasks.

Implications For Time-Management and Prioritizing Skills

In order to work effectively, people need the ability to budget their time. In the typical professional environment, people are given more work than they can realistically handle within normal working hours. Even people with a reasonable workload could improve their business prospects by taking on additional tasks or taking time to make aspects of their work more efficient. For all of these reasons, it is extremely important to be able to manage one’s time successfully. Efficient time management involves the power to weigh the amount of time available versus the tasks that need to be carried out and to choose on a schedule for completing the tasks. Unfortunately, procrastination interferes with the ability to budget time by inflating the amount of time needed to reach a certain milestone or level of completion. For this reason, repeated procrastination can be seen as a sign that an individual lacks the ability to set his or her own time management goals or lacks the discipline to adhere to those goals.

In situations where multitasking is required, procrastination could also be a sign of failure to properly organize priorities. Allowing trivial tasks to take time and energy away from more important goals indicates either an inability to recognize the most important tasks or a lack of concern about whether the most important goals are accomplished in a timely fashion. However, a failure to prioritize might not be entirely the procrastinator’s fault. An employee who does not have enough information to form an overall picture of his or her employer’s goals might not have the perspective to prioritize effectively and might therefore end up wasting time on trivial goals believing that they are important.

It should be remembered that, while occasional procrastination might signal some sort of underlying problem, it is not necessarily a sign of a character flaw or skill deficit. For example, a lack of motivation due to a real or perceived shortcoming in the reward for good time management could be at the root of procrastination.  One example of this might be a work environment in which an employee receives the same compensation regardless of whether his or her deadlines are met. This could result from a poor performer realizing that procrastination is routinely tolerated, but it could also result from a high performer perceiving that outstanding time management is never rewarded. In a work environment, instances of procrastination can reveal overall communication and employee relations issues as well as the underlying issues of individual employees.

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The difficulty of certain projects often provokes a desire to delay or otherwise waste time before getting down to business. This urge to procrastinate can affect people’s lives as an occasional temptation or as a nearly irresistible habit, hinging upon the temperament of the individual.

In three particular fields of activity, namely college, business and home life, procrastination can cause an especially detrimental effect. A closer look at the underlying factors for procrastination in each of these settings can help illuminate some of the influences in the decision to procrastinate.

For many students, procrastination emerges as a significant problem during the first years of college. The college procrastinator is frequently an individual who, for one of several possible reasons, did not learn effective time management strategies during high school. Often accustomed to high school assignments that are purely short term or that have been broken down into a series of littler assignments by the high school teachers, the college procrastinator is at a loss to correct to college’s long term assignments. In some examples, the college procrastinator underestimates the difficulty of a term report or end-of-semester project because the professor does not perpetually remind the class about the forthcoming deadline.

For this reason, the difficulties faced by the college procrastinator can be seen as a failure to adjust from a structured, regulated learning environment into an environment where independent time management skills are necessary. Once the need for discipline and organization has been recognized, a few elementary tools, such as a day planner, can help the college procrastinator organize a self-structured series of goals and deadlines for long-term assignments.

Whereas the college procrastinator might evade a difficult assignment by playing computer games or socializing, the business procrastinator is oft more subtle in his or her strategy. Rather than engaging in meaningless amusements, which might be punished if discovered, the business procrastinator often wastes time on activities that are in fact part or his or her job description but that are not the most important tasks at the moment.

In some cases, a lack of confidence in the ability to successfully complete difficult assignments compels the business procrastinator to pursue easy, straightforward minor tasks. In other situations, an inability to recognise high- and low-priority assignments causes the business procrastinator to perceive that the simple jobs are just as crucial as the complicated ones, leaving the business procrastinator no cause to pursue the more Herculean tasks.

To remedy this circumstance, the business procrastinator first must learn to recognize which tasks have the most potential to impact the success of the business itself and to affect the course of business in the long term. Once this has been achieved, the business procrastinator can analyze long-term, complicated tasks into a series of manageable deadlines so that it's not quite so intense.

Instead of being unable to face a deadline, the home-life procrastinator is often ill at ease with the never-ending nature of daily home-related chores. Yard work, home repairs, cleaning and meal preparation can all assume the uninspiring role of routine inconveniences in a person’s life. As incomplete chores accumulate over time, the home-life postponer begins to feel the pressure of house work invading the joys of routine life.

To counter this situation, a specific time should be set aside each week to schedule a reasonable number of weekly chores. By naming which tasks should be accomplished on which day, the home-life procrastinator can gain control over the amount of work. And by fixing certain tasks to certain days, the procrastinator could stop feeling blameworthy about any unfinished chores provided that he or she has attained the chores earmark for the present day.

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There are so many tools that show you how to relieve stress and it is no wonder. There is so much stress in the world today. Generally people are so busy they have little time for anything.

We are victims of a world gone mad. Think about it. We chase around hour after hour every day and we end up without any time. Money, success, careers and family are what drives us to keep going day in and day out and as a result we have become ’stressed out’; ticking time bombs ready to blow at any minute.

Disease, chronics illness, hypertension and even heart attacks are just some of the symptoms of stress. Most of us don’t even realize the kind of stress we put ourselves under. We have built in mechanisms in our bodies that help us when we are confronted with stressful situations. We were not however supposed deal with stress all the time.

So, what do you do to relieve stress and the effect it can have on your body? In a moment you will get a chance to read 5 tips to effective stress relief but before you do there are two things that you should be doing on a daily basis to help you deal with stress.

The first thing is to get off adrenaline. One of the best tips on how to relieve stress is to plan better. Life happens and there are always going to be surprises you can’t avoid but it doesn’t have to be like this all of the time. A little planning can be the best thing you can do to keep your stress levels down. Your health and well-being could be at stake.

The second thing is to drink less caffeine and if you are a smoker to cut back, or better yet, quit smoking. Nicotine and caffeine can cause harmful stress to the body. Try to limit your intake where possible.

Ok so let’s take a look at 5 things you can do to help your body and mind better deal with stress.

1. Get regular exercise
It doesn’t really matter what you consider exercise. It could be jogging or taking a long brisk walk or even doing a workout at the gym. Regular exercise is what is important and so is making sure you are relaxed while doing it. There is no point in exercising if you hate every minute while you are doing it.

2. Relaxation and meditation
I know it sounds easy to say just relax or chill out but most people don’t know how to. You don’t have to know the art of meditation in order to just get a little uninterrupted time for yourself on a consistent basis.

3. Go out and spoil yourself
This doesn’t mean you go out and start shopping ladies. It does mean doing something for yourself. What you could do is go to a spa and enjoy a relaxing massage or you could sit down to a good book and a little alone time.

4. Video and board games
Games can be excellent stress relievers. You may want to choose careful the people you play the game with so as to avoid tension because of competitiveness. There are some great free software games you can download off the internet that are great to help relieve stress

5. Get some decent sleep
Make sure you get enough rest. When you interrupt your sleeping patterns you put unnecessary and potentially harmful stress on your body. If you are constantly thinking you are not resting. It may not sound possible but you can turn off thoughts about worry simply by not reacting to them.

You do not need to do all of the above right away but you should start with one, get in the habit of doing it regularly and then start the next one. Relaxing is what is important not what you do. Start today.

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For the past few months, I had been seriously contemplating a career switch, or at the worst case scenario, I’ll just stay at home and do my own stuff. I had been feeling very stressed at work, and I did not look forward to going to work. I would cry when I drive to work, but after reading Awaken The Giant Within by Anthony Robbins, I decided to do something about it.

To get rid of negative thoughts, play the scenes where you feel really lousy about yourself. See those experiences like a movie. It could be that of a bad breakup, or your boss scolding you, or any experiences that you have extremely negative vibes about.

After that, replay the scenes backwards at extra fast speed. Distort the scenes and make one person’s head big, or if someone had said something nasty, watch how they swallow their words and imagine the words rushing out from the years like steam. If someone had been nasty, imagine their faces being distorted, or their ears growing till Dumbo’s size. Make the faces green or purple. Then, fast forward the movie, and then backwards many times, until the entire negative experiences become cartoonish and laughable. Add your favourite cartoon’s funny sounds or soundtrack with as much exaggeration and humour.

If you can do this effectively, whatever that has been affecting you for years will no longer affect you. You have broken the pattern of associating such images to pain. Instead, you will see such situations differently.

I tried that, and while I cannot say whether it is hundred percent successful, I already feel so much better about going to work, and even though the workload is still very heavy, I’m actually enjoying myself. I still have some way to go before I resolve my issues about my career path, but for now, I am feeling way better than I did a few months back.

By doing this, you get to break the negative thought pattern. You scramble the sensations. Try it and let me know in your comments. It could be about your phobia towards creatures such as cockroaches and lizards, or an unhappy relationship, or fears about public speaking.

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My mother had always been a superstitious person. She always thought that whenever she made fun of something, it would happen to us. For example, when she was younger, she laughed at a person who was pimply-faced. My brother and I grew up with bad acne, and we were on medication for years. She felt it was her fault and kept blaming herself.

There was another occasion, when pop rings were introduced. One of her students licked a lollipop that was placed on a plastic ring, and she was quite irritated with her. When she came home that very day, she saw my brother and I doing the same thing. She was always puzzled why such things would happen even though she really hated them. Well, she might be on to something. That was the Law of Attraction.

When you have either positive thoughts or negative thoughts, the brain waves will transmit them to the other party. When there are enough of them, they will influence the other parties. If you are extremely close to someone, you can know what they are thinking. That’s because they will be sending out some kind of signals, and your brain waves are in sync with each other.

I have mentioned this before, about how I dealt with the difficult clients. I was in the middle of my work when the clerk came running to me, saying one client had come unannounced and he was being very insistent that he had to see me. He claimed that he had been working a few days without much sleep and he had no other time to meet me. This was the same person I spoke to the other time over the phone, and it was not a pleasant experience. So, I decided to use what I preach, and tried to think positive thoughts, that the meeting would go on smoothly. I would get the other party to see my point. I also decided to smile and block out other thoughts that could make the meeting unsuccessful.

To my expectations, the client was not as bad as I thought. I had heard horror stories of how he had lost his temper badly before, but he was alright. We talked, and he was able to open up. In fact, he asked whether I would continue to be on his case next year. I felt bad at saying something that might change, since I was considering a career change, but since nothing was confirmed, I told him that I would continue to be if there were no other changes. It was not a real answer, but he was satisfied. When he left, he even said that I was caring and helpful. Coming from someone who had felt the organisation was against him, the words carried weight.

Unfortunately, when I met with two other clients later, tears became the norm. We were sitting outside at the reception area. I met with the first group of clients there. One of them broke down and cried. She was sitting at this particular seat that was facing the greenery. After the longest time, the two left.

I had two other groups of clients waiting, and they could see what was going on. I made a mistake of getting the next client to sit at the same place, and all the negativity was still in the air. Everything went on smoothly, when suddenly, the lady sitting in the same seat as the former client opened up to me about her personal situation, and started crying. Within half an hour, I had at least two people crying.

I decided that the negativity was enough for the day, and I had to make some switches. The last party who had seen everything was sitting beside us, so I switched over when the lady left, and I changed position. The stuff we had to talk about was similar, as they had their emotional baggage and pain, but at least I tried to inject more positive thinking.

My mother knows something about how thinking affects situations, but she pinned it down to superstition. It is actually more of the Law of Attraction.
 

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What separates the great and the normal can be procrastination. It is one of the deadly diseases that prevent success. I overheard this in the staff lounge a few days ago. My colleague has a paper to submit, and no matter how much time she has, she can never finish it early. She has a friend who can get As on a constant basis, even though she will usually submit the work half an hour just before the deadline.

I’m facing the same problem now, so even though I’m given a head start to do my work, I’m still feeling the pain of completing it. I went to a café on a Saturday to do my work, but after 3 hours of staring at the paper, I got sleepy and went home. Unfortunately, the moment I got home, I simply could not get started.

I’ve also been trying to survive my work by waking up at 3 or 4 am in the morning to complete whatever work I have. I sleep rather early, because the day is exhausting, and sleeping late is really bad for the complexion. Our skin repairs itself the best between 11pm and 1am, confirmed by Chinese physicians and also Western scientists. That’s why people get dark circles if they sleep late.

Unfortunately this is not a long-term solution, hence I need to learn to avoid procrastination. I need to step out of my comfort zone and do things that I dislike. Perhaps what Tim Ferris said in his book was right. We should not have long deadlines, because we will never stick to it. Instead, do things when they are required, because we work best under tight conditions.

If we submit our work late, we hold up other’s deadlines and their work. It’s really unfair when you have such co-workers. It’s probably because of this that I feel I face a lot of stress at work. It’s a bad habit I need to kick. One way to overcome it is to start on things when we get them, so that if there are any things that demand our time, they will not hold up our progress.

I really have no idea how my colleague manages to finish his work way before deadlines are set. He is really coping well with work, and he is getting promotions faster than others. That goes to show that when you overcome a deadly disease like procrastination, you can succeed.

One thing you can do to complete task on time is to shorten the time length required. Meeting deadlines is part and parcel of academic life and working life, so do preserve and do the work that is a pain in the ass before you enjoy yourself. It is only then you can enjoy yourself without any worries.

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The young kids know this very well. Whenever they want a toy or something, they will keep pestering the parents till they succeed. When I read the One Minute Millionaire, by Mark Victor Hansen and Robert Allen, there was a story about a woman who overcame rejection to get what she wants.

Usually, there are three rejections that a person will face before succeeding. However, too many people give up after the first rejection. When the topic is breeched for the first time, the decision-maker will not be receptive yet, because it takes time for the thought to be in the mind. The second time the request is made, the decision-maker will say no again, but this time round, the thought has taken root in the person’s mind. However, even more people give up after the second rejection. If the person dares to try again, and faces the third rejection, the decision-maker will start to waver. As long as the person asks the person what it will take for a yes, half a battle is won. Usually, there is a way to meet the demands.

Actually, this idea corresponds with the Chinese way of demanding their way. This dramatic way has three steps too. The first step is to cry. The second step is to create a scene. The third step is to pretend to hang herself, or to use death as a threat. Of course, this is a little over the top, but the philosophy is the same. Usually, a person will cave in after saying no for three times. If you look at this on the flip side, getting teenagers to stay out of trouble, such as smoking, drinking, drugs or sex, is quite tough when they surround themselves with people who constantly badgers them to try something new.

If we use this to our advantage in getting our way without bringing harm to others, then this psychology will be useful. It is just like fire. We can let fire engulf us, or we can control fire to cook food. Anyone who uses psychology to do bad things will not be able to stay successful for long. 

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